To the POC in my neighborhood

This came up in my facebook memories. I wrote it on this day in 2017.

To the people of color in my neighborhood,

If you see me glancing your direction in the grocery store, or keeping an eye on you in the streets, please know that I am not looking your direction with suspicion, hatred, or malice. I'm looking your direction because I know you are vulnerable, a target. I'm not really looking at you, I'm looking at your perimeter, looking for any threats that might be headed in your direction. I'm extending my own personal bubble of situational awareness around you and I'm preparing to step in to protect you as I would protect myself.

If you glance back, you will receive a smile. I understand that you may not be able to tell in the moment if I'm an ally or an enemy so for your own safety, you decide to lump me into the enemy category and look back at me with suspicion. Just as men have to understand how every woman must protect themselves until an individual has proven themselves to be a safe person, I totally understand that in our current climate, POC must look at me the same way in order to keep themselves safe. I hope a moment of confrontation where the people around you must prove themselves to be with you, against you, or indifferent bystander never comes, but if it does, I will be with you.

I will not hate you for your suspicion of me. I understand and accept it. I look forward to the day when if you see a white person looking at you in this country, you can assume it's because you're looking very nice that day and are being admired, rather than feeling that fight or flight instinct that puts you on edge. And I'm sorry that my looking your direction makes you uncomfortable. I don't know how else to have your back other than to look your direction to confirm you're ok. I hope I'm choosing the best of my options to be a friend to you. If I'm not, I'm listening to be told a better way to be one.

Sincerely,

Just one individual lily white blonde